M*A*S*H Ad Infinitum

Someone with way too much time on their hands has documented the many variations of the opening credits for M*A*S*H.

Some seasons have as many as four different versions.

Check it out.

http://tushball.com/MASH.html

Charles Nelson Reilly, Rest in BLANK

Charles Nelson Reilly has passed away at the age of 76.

I trust he, Nipsey Russell and Gene Rayburn are having a grand old time upstairs, filling in the blanks, waiting for the arrival of a few more panelists, so they can get back to playing MATCH GAME.

You can find reruns on GSN at 9am/8am Central. Hopefully, we'll get a marathon tribute soon.

This clip features Charles, Nipsey &, of course, Gene in an episode of MATCH GAME PM - not necessarily at their best, but it's the best I could find.

How Big Is IDOL?

There are TWO HOURS of original programming going up against IDOL tonight.

TWO. The finale of LOST.

NBC, CBS and even the CW are airing reruns all night long.

Duck and cover, baby. Duck and cover.

This. Is. American. Idol.

Tonight's the big night - the AMERICAN IDOL finale.

The IDOL producers have a gi-normous task ahead of the them if they hope to top last year's star-studded finale.

Some interesting things are going on in IDOL land.

Last week, HOUSE became the first show in IDOL history to build on IDOL's lead-in. Yep, Dr. House beat AMERICAN IDOL.

Last night, something far more curious occurred. FOX lost a night that included AMERICAN IDOL.

IDOL itself is off 15 percent versus last year. Plus, the finale of DANCING WITH THE STARS walloped the premiere of THE LOT. THE LOT lost 72 percent of the IDOL lead-in, then lost another 40 percent of the audience left at the half hour.

Not a good sign.

I did enjoy THE LOT though - especially the part when the contestants had to look under their seats to find out which log line they'd be pitching the next morning. Some good ideas for some fun films! Do check it out - before it gets shuffled off to the dollar theatre.

Back to IDOL.

My heart's pulling for Blake, but my head knows Jordin's going to be singing that generic ballad one more time tonight. I bet she cries at the end tonight, too.

BTW - did you notice Jordin DIDN'T cry when the clip was played back at the end of the show? Know why? IDOL uses footage of the previous night's rehearsal for the show recaps. It was very noticeable last night.

Enjoy.

FOX '07-'08

OK, it's FOX's turn at the upfronts. This season FOX locked up the win in Adults 18-49 sooner months before the season wrapped. Next season, they've got a prime time Super Bowl in their pocket.

And while the opposition may refer to AMERICAN IDOL as "the Death Star" - keep in mind that the last few weeks of IDOL have actually been down versus last year. In fact, this past week HOUSE outperformed AMERICAN IDOL for the first time ever. If IDOL is the Death Star, what does that make Dr. House? He walks with a stick, but he's not green so no Yoda reference. He's tall, but not particularly hairy - sorry, I digress.

The lineup:

MON - PRISON BREAK and K-VILLE (an over the top 'escapist' show and a new drama about the police force in post-Katrina New Orleans)

TUE - NEW AMSTERDAM and HOUSE (a new drama about an immortal detective who's been working in NYC since it was Dutch and the medical drama that's bigger than the Death Star)

WED - BACK TO YOU, TIL DEATH and BONES (a new sitcom starring Kelsey Grammer and Patricia Heaton about a life at a TV station, Heaton's former RAYMOND co-star Brad Garrett's growing sitcom about married life and a forensics mystery that's started to dominate its time slot as well)

THUR - ARE YOU SMARTER THAN A 5TH GRADER and KITCHEN NIGHTMARES - (a simple game show with a well executed premise and a new reality show from GORDON RAMSEY in which he will step in and try to save a failing restaurant over the course of one week)

FRI - THE SEARCH FOR THE NEXT GREAT AMERICAN BAND and NASHVILLE (an IDOL style competition featuring bands instead of singers and and faux-reality soap set in the music industry from the producers of LAGUNA BEACH)

SAT - COPS and AMERICA'S MOST WANTED - (two old standbys that are starting to show their age)

SUN - THE SIMPSONS, KING OF THE HILL, FAMILY GUY and AMERICAN DAD (four animated comedies for grown ups that are facing more competition and a smaller audience year by year)

In January:

MON - K-VILLE and 24 (PRISON BREAK will return in March)

TUE - IDOL and HOUSE

WED - BACK TO YOU, TIL DEATH and IDOL

THUR - 5TH GRADER and CANTERBURY'S LAW (Julianna Margulies as a defense attorney)

FRI - BONES and NEW AMSTERDAM

SUN - KING, DAD, SIMPSONS, GUY and THE SARAH CONNOR CHRONICLES (TV sequel to TERMINATOR 2)

CANTERBURY - yawn. I don't care if I ever see another lawyer show right now.

AMSTERDAM - an interesting concept, although it may suffer in comparison to CBS's MOONLIGHT.

K-VILLE - the concept doesn't do much for me, but I'll wait to see some trailers.

KITCHEN NIGHTMARES and NASHVILLE both strike me as shows better left to cable.

Moving BONES and AMSTERDAM to Fridays is a huge risk - and note that FOX planned to move BONES to Fridays this spring, but too many new shows failed.

I'm not entirely sold on the SARAH CONNOR show - but I'm very excited to see FOX bringing a drama back to Sunday night.

BACK TO YOU is being produced by FRASIER's Christopher Lloyd - this could be a giant new comedy that will put a stake in the heart of a project very dear to me (JOINED IN PROGRESS).

The CW remains....

CBS Stays the Course

It's CBS' turn at the upfronts.

CBS is currently the 'most watched' network, winning in total viewers and households. They're #2 in the coveted Adults 18-49, behind FOX. Will the '07-'08 season be the year they catch up? Probably not. Will this be the year they try a lineup packed with innovation and bold moves? Not even close.

MON - HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER, THE BIG BANG THEORY, TWO AND A HALF MEN, RULES OF ENGAGEMENT, CSI: MIAMI - Only one new show on a night of decent success. BANG was originally called THE IT GROUP or THE IT CLUB, I can't remember - and all traces of the original title have been erased from the internet. It's about computer geeks (the I.T. guys) who are dating chicks out of their league.

TUE - NCIS, THE UNIT and CANE - CANE stars Jimmy Smits and is about a family Rum business.

WED - KID NATION, CRIMINAL MINDS and CSI: NY - A reality show that transplants LORD OF THE FLIES to the Old West, and two shows I don't watch.

THUR - SURVIVOR: CHINA, CSI and WITHOUT A TRACE - SURVIVOR's fading and TRACE returns to its original time slot.

FRI - GHOST WHISPERER, MOONLIGHT and NUMB3RS - Jennifer Love Hewitt's bosom helps spirits rest in peace, a vampire plays detective (but he's not Angel, so who cares?) and math.

SAT - CRIMETIME SATURDAY and 48 HOURS MYSTERY - reruns and a newsmag.

SUN - 60 MINUTES, VIVA LAUGHLIN, COLD CASE and SHARK - VIVA is based on a BBC miniseries and is a musical. I'm going to have to unleash the search engine in my TiVo to find VIVA BLACKPOOL on BBC America. Hugh Jackman is involved - could be genius, could be COP ROCK.

I don't think there's anything here for me. Not even JLH's bosom will make me sit through a predictable CBS drama.

Someday, I'll find time to watch HOW I MET YOUR STEPMOTHER, but we're not there yet.

CBS has no chance of catching FOX next year (FOX has the Super Bowl). But they'll still win in households - although I'm not sure why that matters - houses don't buy anything, people do.

More to come....

ABC's Turn

Upfront week continues....

While NBC seems to have decided the route to success means little innovation, ABC seems to be taking a different track.

MON - DANCING WTH THE STARS, SAM I AM, THE BACHELOR - That's a reality competition, a sitcom starring Christina Applegate as an amnesia victim who wasn't a very nice person before her condition, and an aging relationship/reality piece of poo. (Wonder what would happen if Sam I Am hooked up with My Name Is Earl....)

TUE - CAVEMEN, CARPOOLERS, DANCING RESULTS and BOSTON LEGAL - a sitcom based on a commercial (which is getting VERY bad buzz on Madison Avenue) a comedy about guys who share a ride to work, more DANCING and an solid lawyer show.

WED - PUSHING DAISIES, PRIVATE PRACTICE, DIRTY SEXY MONEY - An entire night of new shows! Wow! That's a drama about a fellow who solves crimes by temporarily bringing the victims back to life (GHOST WHISPERER meets CSI), a spinoff from GREY'S ANATOMY and
a soap about the lawyer of a rich and powerful family. LOST will return at a time period 'to be announced' on this night in January.

THUR - UGLY BETTY, GREY'S ANATOMY and BIG SHOTS - Two successes and a soap about powerful CEO's who are putty in their wife's hands. Surprised that PRIVATE PRACTICE didn't get this slot.

FRI - MEN IN TREES, WOMEN'S MURDER CLUB, 20/20 - That's a so-so chick drama, better suited to pairing up with GREY'S or HOUSEWIVES, a new show about four women who use their collective professional expertise to solve crime, and a newsmag.

SAT - COLLEGE FOOTBALL - 'nuff said.

SUN - AMERICA'S FUNNIEST HOME VIDEOS, EXTREME MAKEOVER: HOME EDITION, DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES, BROTHERS & SISTERS - No changes, a wise decision.

My take, SAM I AM will have a great led-in, but that 9:30/8:30c start time could be trouble.

CAVEMEN is a horrible idea - Geico is actually going to pull the great ad campaign for the two weeks this show will be on the air.

CARPOOLERS will struggle as a result of its lead-in.

DAISIES could be interesting - might be a tough TiVo choice is FOX keeps BONES in that slot.

The only other ABC show I come close to watching is FUNNIEST HOME VIDEOS. Is it me or is ABC slowly becoming a chick drama network? Doesn't mean it's not working, though.

5 hours of non-scripted reality stuff - 22% (36% if you count football)

Repurposed programming - ZERO

Reruns - ZERO

(See, NBC? It can be done.)

More to come...

NBC - Now 55% Fresh!

It's upfront week in TV-dom, the week the networks announce their fall lineups.

And why do the networks roll out a fall lineup? Because back in the day, they had to roll out exciting new shows to serve as spot carriers for the new models rolling off the Detroit assembly lines. That's why.

So, let's take a look at NBC - the proud as a peacock 4th place network. The network that once publicly excoriated FOX for relying on reality programming. The network that recently announced plans to abandon scripted programming at 8/7 Central.

Disclaimer: I'll be using info from the announced January lineups, since Sunday nights will feature NFL games until then.

NBC programs seven nights, if you count Saturday - that's 22 hours of programming.

MON - DEAL OR NO DEAL, HEROES and JOURNEYMAN - an unscripted game show (that is repurposed on CNBC), a hit (that is repurposed on SCI-FI) and what amounts to a remake of QUANTUM LEAP. A man travels back and forth in time, changes people's lives and reconnects with his true love - not his wife.

TUE - THE BIGGEST LOSER, CHUCK and LAW & ORDER: SVU - a reality competition (that is repurposed on USA), a new show from the creators of THE O.C. about a geek who accidentally downloads a bunch og government secrets into his brain - Adam Baldwin (FIREFLY, THE X-FILES) co-stars so I might tune in, and L&O.

WED - DEAL OR NO DEAL, THE BIONIC WOMAN and LIFE - a second episode of an unscripted game show (that also airs on CNBC), a reimagining of a '70s sci-fi classic (that will also be repurposed on SCI-FI) and a crime drama featuring a detective who has just served some time for a crime he didn't commit (which will be repurposed on LIFETIME). yes, an entire night of programming you can watch on a different night on different channels - who needs a TiVo?

THUR - MY NAME IS EARL, 30 ROCK, THE OFFICE, SCRUBS and ER - the only comedies on NBC's schedule, and the final season of a once mighty giant on a once mighty night.

FRI - THE SINGING BEE, LAS VEGAS and FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS - a reality competition that requires contestants to sing lyrics perfectly or be eliminated (apparently the notes don't count), a marginally successful drama and a show about high school football on a night when anyone can go to their local high school and see high school football.

SAT - DATELINE NBC and VARIOUS REPEATS - a newsmagazine mired in the pursuit of online sexual predators to the degree that one wonders when they're going to hire Maury Povich to host (that is repourposed on MSNBC), and two hours of things that are already being repurposed on other channels on other nights. Why bother?

SUN - DATELINE NBC, LAW & ORDER, MEDIUM and LIPSTICK JUNGLE - see above, L&O, a show that might actually do well in this slot and Brooke Shields in an effort to recapture the SEX IN THE CITY lightning in a bottle.

Overall, 6 hours of non-scripted programming - 27%
2 hours of scheduled repeats 9%
10 hours of repurposed programming - 45%

Yep, almost HALF of the NBC schedule can be seen at other times - any wonder why their mired in 4th place?

I'm a HEROES fan. I'll check out THE BIONIC WOMAN, CHUCK and LIFE. But if I didn't have a TiVO - and more than 80% of Americans don't - I wouldn't give up 24, HOUSE or LOST for any of these new shows.

Tomorrow, more....

Carnival Skittles!

No TV this time - something better!

Better than TV? Say it ain't so! (OK, it ain't so, but it's pretty darn good nonetheless)

Mmmmm...... Carnival Skittles..... skittley goodness......

Candy Apples, Cotton Candy, Green Slushie (is that a flavor?) Red Licorice and Bubble Gum! Wot, no funnel cake?

Bumped into it a Wal-Mart tonight. Yummy stuff.

More Riches!

A brief followup to last night's Random Thoughts.

THE RICHES has just been renewed by FX.

Congrats to Eddie Izzard, everyone's favorite executive transvestite.

Random Thoughts 050807

There may be SPOILERS ahead. Proceed with caution if you're not completely caught on your good TV watchin'.

May sweeps is upon us, but for myself, not nearly like it used to be.

GILMORE GIRLS is calling it a wrap in two weeks. Hope they go off into the sunset properly. This season seemed like so much filler, delaying the happy ending fans want by an entire calendar year for no other purpose than to waste TiVo space.

I'm enjoying THE RICHES. It's such a unique setting and I believe I would watch Eddie Izzard in just about anything (except for MY SUPER EX-GIRLFRIEND - cue Meatloaf "I can't do that!")

If I haven't mentioned it before, I recommend By Ken Levine - he wrote for M*A*S*H, CHEERS and FRASIER among others. He posts more regularly than I do - and he's a lot funnier. Every now and then he'll discuss some behind the scenes stuff from FRASIER or CHEERS - and sometimes he just vents about AMERICAN IDOL - just like 50% of all bloggers known to mankind.

I was stunned by what happened on tonight's 24. It sucked the life out of the last 15 minutes of the episode - literally. I was hoping to a lot more of Milo down the road.

I think maybe THE SIMPSONS is getting better lately. I caught Mrs. Kimosabe chuckling Sunday.

The producers of LOST have managed to convince Disney it's best to have a planned ending to the series, rather than go one season too long. Remember the final season of THE X-FILES? Not gonna happen to LOST. Three more semi-seasons, consisting of 16 episodes each. Expect LOST to return in Feb '08 and run without repeats through May.

Gotta admit - I got a bit excited seeing the SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE promo Sunday night. Made me miss Gretel a bit. Wave, Gretel!

Holy cow - I COMPLETELY forgot to go see SPIDER-MAN 3 this week. Apparently, I was responsible for the single unsold seat in America this weekend. $151 million. And it's still in the $100 million in red.

All I need is maybe $10,000 to shoot my movie. You know, if everyone who reads this blog contributed just $1, I'd only have to come up with $9,995 on my own....

Odds are, if you're reading this, you've read FIRST AVAILABLE - but just in case you're an agent looking to hire a brilliant new writer - but are willing to settle for me, here's a link to the script.

Gotta run - Hollywood calling now! Nope, just a telemarketer. Stupid caller ID. It never tells me when Hollywood calls...they are going to call - right?

Hello?

Hello?

Milt Grant Signs Off

Old broadcasters never die, they just play the national anthem, then sign off.

TV broadcaster Milt Grant signed off for the last time Saturday in his home in Fort Lauderdale, Florida.

Milt had quite the career in TV. He was there at the beginning - in the 1950's Washington, D.C. he hosted THE MILT GRANT SHOW, a local version of Phildelphia's BANDSTAND.

If I remember the story correctly, Milt's show was so huge, when WTTG tried to raise his rates, not only did he take the show to the competition, he BOUGHT the competition - WDCA.

Eventually, Milt built a fairly substantial TV group, with stations in Miami, Chicago, and Philadelphia. But Milt made a fatal error, he paid way too much cash for his programming in a time when barter syndication deals became the norm.

(Barter syndication means the syndicating studio, say Paramount receives commercial time within the program to sell instead of cash payments. TV stations get less commercial time in these shows, but don't have to lay out any cash.)

I remember, reading Electronic Media in my college library, following the story of Grant Broadcasting impending bankruptcy. The group owed so much money to Paramount, they had to give the license to the Chicago TV station to the studio in lieu of payment. It was something like $93 million - in 1984 - when money was money. I had no idea, I'd eventually wind up working for the man.

Milt eventually lost his other stations as well, but in 1990, he was back for another round. He acquired WZDX-TV in Huntsville, Alabama from the bankrupt Media Central group, and began rebuilding his empire - on a smaller, but profitable, scale.

(Somehow, my career has taken down a path that intersected with not one but THREE former Media Central stations, WDBD, Jackson, MS, WXTX in Ciolumbus, GA and WZDX - but I think that's another column for another day.)

Other Grant stations can be found in Davenport, IA, La Crosse, WI and Roanoke, VA.

I worked for Milt. Milt was a pioneer. He was a determined man, who had it all, lost it all, and rebuilt it. He was a hard man to please and because of that we had more than our share of differences.

I don't think he ever got over the bankruptcy. The broadcasting industry was hit particularly hard in the post 9/11 economy. It must have been a very nervous time for him.

It seemed to me that he never quite adjusted to the 500 channel universe and dismissed the impact of basic cable and an ever diminishing audience for syndicated re-runs. His sense of design and on-air composition never quite evolved out of the early '80s. He tended to prefer what he must have seen as safe, proven marketing campaigns in a time that required innovation and a degree of risk taking.

Nonetheless, the man carved a path. A path that was wide and clear, and enabled hundreds of people to join him on the fantastic journey that is broadcast television.

He told great stories. He served in the OSS in North Africa. He was instrumental in the success of Link Wray and His Ray Men. Most of all, he never gave up.

Without a doubt, there will never be another one like him.